Illusions and Things That Matter Most

It is such an incredible experience to read Jordan and Mikayla's letters every week. Just when you think it isn't possible to love your children anymore--you do! I love watching who they are becoming all on their own. I love watching the talents and opportunities emerging. I hold my breath and just pray and pray when they are experiencing trials, but continually obedience brings blessing and I am so grateful to know that no matter how far away, they are never alone. Mikayla doesn't have a phone, but I love that I get to talk to her almost every day on the computer and that Jordan has been commanded=) to write home every week. Those communications bring us such joy.

May Day was last Tuesday. I bought some flowers and ding-dong-ditched my family. It was fun. I'm glad I haven't gotten around to planting them yet because it froze hard, twice, last week. Of course, Fred couldn't be restrained and planted his beloved watermelon already, but it seems to be alright so far. Crazy Idaho weather.=) 

One of Jordan's friends stopped by on Thursday, just to visit. He stayed for a couple of hours reading us his "lists" out of his little notebooks while we gave him a hard time. He's a funny kid and it was completely enjoyable. We talked him into staying for dinner--which I hadn't really gotten around to making because he was visiting--so I pulled some Chimichangas out of the freezer and then burned some rice because I kept getting distracted by our conversations, but he was a good sport and ate it all anyway. He was always a picky eater before his mission, but he's come a long way with food.=)

This weekend Mikayla received a letter from a good friend in the mission field. The young man, who has always been a favorite of Mikayla's (and mine=) surprised her with the confession that he had always liked her and was only brave enough to tell her now that he was far away and gone for two years. What a cute and crazy boy! I'm not sure that is quite the way he is supposed to be "focusing on his mission"--maybe he's just hoping for a little insurance=)--but he's a good kid and it did make Mikayla's day in a big way.

Last Sunday, in Sacrament meeting, a sister bore her testimony and shared an analogy for the atonement that I thought was insightful. She said her family went bike riding on the green belt but had to ride quite slowly because of their 5 year old daughter who tired quickly. She said at one point her daughter decided to get off her bike and carry it because she thought it would be easier than pedaling. Of course she quickly realized that wasn't the case, but this sister related that to how we sometimes have that same mentality when we don't take advantage of the Atonement in our lives. It is like getting off the bike and carrying it instead. I love symbolism and imagery! It just seems to make life lessons seem so obvious and compelling.

Seven more days and Eden, Lily and Sophie are out of school, then we have to wait another 9 until Abe joins the "summer vacation ranks". Those  are always a hard couple of weeks trying to keep up a schedule for one kid without the others feeling restricted and without him feeling left out. I am ready for them all to be home! I was talking to a sister in our ward today and mentioning how excited I was to have school out soon and have my kids home full time and she mentioned that she wasn't looking forward to the constant complaining of her kids being bored. I don't think my kids would dare be bored!=) That's a sure fire way to get Mom to find something constructive for them to do and it usually involves that dreaded four letter word...W-O-R-K. Fred is trying to carefully talk me into buying another pool for the kids. That's not exactly in the budget and they are so expensive, but our other pool sure was a great summertime experience.  We'll have to see if there is something else we want to give up.

I started writing this on Sunday, while sitting on the couch with Freddy as he worked on his genealogy, having just written Jordan and while chatting with Mikayla online. I was facing our family picture wall, where I have put a portrait of Christ directly in the center. It felt so peaceful and I was so contented looking at my family all surrounding him and for that brief moment all seemed right with the world. A few days have passed and I now have a horrific cold, which makes our busy lives and our ever accumulating home feel chaotic at the moment, but it is stabilizing to remember that this is the illusion and Sundays peace was the reality of things that matter most and that I will feel that way again--hopefully soon.=)

Quote of the week:"If pain and sorrow and total punishment immediately followed the doing of evil, no soul would repeat a misdeed. If joy and peace and rewards were instantaneously given the doer of good, there could be no evil--all would do good and not because of the rightness of doing good. There would be no test of strength, no development of character, no growth of powers, no free agency. . . . There would also be an absence of joy, success, resurrection, eternal life, and godhood."--Spencer W. Kimball